Thursday, April 1, 2010

a new friend?! neato!

Why is it so hard to make a new friend?  It's just weird at first.  The whole remembering new names and then the small talk and finally the exchange of phone numbers - IF anyone is brave enough to bring it up.  Then, once that's over - someone has to actually use the number.  If that happens, then, schedules actually have to coordinate.  "Are the kids really sick?"  "Are errands really interfering?"  "They just don't see potential in us?"  I mean, all I want is someone who doesn't mind the dog, the mess, crying kids and who likes the occasional Oprah, or coffee, or walk to the park.  Hell, I'd settle for half of that list and a once-a-month walk to the park.  Not to discount any potential friendship, but at this point, I'd take just about anyone.  After moving twice in the last year and being at home all day everyday (grocery shopping or driving MN-SD has been my definition of 'outing' for the last year and friends!?  what friends!?), I'm getting sick of myself.  Today, on our walk (the boys and I), we met someone!  Wowee.  She even has that friend-ish potential.  I try not to get my hopes up, cause most of these initial meetings are not fruitful...but I can't help feeling a little giddy at the idea of a friend about my age, two toddlers (even if they are girls), who seems active and wasn't hesitant to cross the road to stop and say hi. Not to mention, she lives 2 doors down and is also a stay at home-er.  Now, I have also noticed several other moms at home playing outside during the day.  I'm bound to run into them sometime, however, I have noticed some seem scared - and I too, have done this.  You know, you see someone coming, who looks like you're on their agenda.  As they're about a half block away and you try to hurry inside while making it look as natural as possible to avoid the meeting for some dumb reason (like your bad hairday or lack of makeup).  Yes, I've done it - and am getting better at letting go of the ridiculousness.  So, I'm hoping to catch more 'friends' before they escape the initial meeting.  Maybe it's as simple as a wave, so they have to acknowledge your presence and intent to meet them before they escape!?  Yeah, I'll try the wave next time.  Like a net!  Ha!  I'll get 'em!  Until I've got a neighborhood buddy, I guess I'll get my butt out there and keep trying until I have a friend, damn it. 

Hmm - too aggressive?  scaring people off?  Well, I know sitting in my own yard hasn't worked.

"Hey Will, wanna go for a walk!?"

5 comments:

  1. Now, I know there's the exception - surprisingly, I do have a couple friends out there (and you know who you are, and thanks) - but I think you all know where I'm going with this one.

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  2. I feel like your actually in my brain with this one. I know you and I have talked about this before and if we lived closer all our problems would be solved! But I have yet to meet anyone who could be a potential friend. My problem is that it seems so small town here. Everyone already has their niches and aren't looking to add to them. I've tried MOPS, church, the park, etc. and still NO hints of friendship to be found! My next venture will be straight up asking my OB doctor's nurse if she'll hang out with me. After 4 years in good ol' ND YES I'm just that brave! (or desperate) It just seems we hit it off every time I'm in there (which is a lot these days seeing how I'm 7 months preggo) and I think we could get along great! So we'll see, but on that note GOOD LUCK Jackie, be brave! and if you ever move back my way, please give me a call!

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  3. Go for it. Ask her! I can just hear it "So, this might sound a little off the wall and I hope it doesn't violate the 'patient/nurse' relationship, but..." You can do it - she's probably thinking the same thing and would be so happy you asked. GF is weird like that. I've found that the neighborhood I moved into is very active. Everyone knows everyone. Very different than our neighborhood in SD or even in Plymouth. I'm just hoping we can meld with the neighbors smoothly this summer. Time will tell. Good Luck to you too! Bummer we're so far.

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  4. Jacki,

    Now you've got TWO friends!! :) It was fun officially meeting you guys the other night. This summer should be fun...I think we're in for lots of late nights on the playset, followed up with "adult time" around the campfire. Good times!

    Have a great weekend and we'll see ya around "the hood"! :)

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  5. Some things change so slowly! My generation of stay-at-home moms experienced the same thing. Hang in there, Girls!

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